York the Kiwi is nice. Quiet. Straightforward. Seemed on first meeting to be good friend material at least. 

We were in a board game bar in SE London, playing Betrayal at the House on the Hill along with 4 others I had just met at this gaming meetup. One of the players was stuck in the basement of the haunted house. I noticed that only a basement-only card could create a 2-way passage to the ground floor, and I suggested suggesting strategically going for a stack with this type of ground-only floor. York quietly berated me, because we should only take cards as they come.

This was my fourth date in a busy two weeks since settling into a lovely Airbnb home in London. This one was a setup by one of my dearest LSE friends, who knew that I love board games and smart people. It clicked to her that York, a Kiwi who had spent some time in Geneva as well, and until recently also a traveler, was trying to build community just as I was. He was a regular at one of London’s strategy board game meetups & invited me to join. I said hell yes, I’ll meet him!

It was an odd first date though. I showed up to a group of guys already sitting, chatting with their beers and in their own rhythm, and did not get any good 1:1 initial chatter in. I tried throwing in some humor to the crowd, but found my comments about an (annoying and expensive but necessary) 5-hour hair appointment falling flat with this group of nerdy engineers and role playing gamers.

But by the end, things changed. We had all relaxed a bit. Once all games had ended, York and I started making more small talk. The group moved towards the exit and the trains, and we started sharing more and opening up. He had seemed way to shy for me at first, but after another ten minutes of chatter I had decided he was interesting, and importantly, kind and inquisitive.

So I’m not sure if there’s a spark, but I haven’t ruled out the possibility. At the end I had him trying to guess my nationality – I threw out all the usual, “we used to hold the world record for highest recorded blood alcohol level of an alive human!”; “we were the first country to declare independence from the Soviet Union!” (no, not Poland; why does nobody seem to know this important factoid?); “we have the world’s highest suicide rate!” (no, not Finland). He’s still left guessing, so I suggest it would be fun to go to a meetup together, or chat again & get to know each other – and, teasingly, that he has to figure out this fun fact without me. I pivot, turn, and head to my train. 

The next day he texts me how fun it was to meet, and that we should try to hang out – that he doesn’t have a meetup in mind but would be up for something more adventurous. Good signal, he’s in for personal connection! So, here’s someone who’s graduated to a second date. To be continued.